I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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