i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize