you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
