She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize