Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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