Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
