she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize