i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
operation harelip BJ is a go
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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