I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
