Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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