WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I need to calm my uterus...
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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