if i died would you start the facebook group?
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
