i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
i came on her dog
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
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