Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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