I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
