I hope mine doesn't look like that
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
