on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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