She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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