school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Randomize
