it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
