yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
