nut hugger
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize