Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
