windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize