it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
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