just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
