careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
