There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
