it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Randomize
