wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
