Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
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