i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Randomize
