wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize
