I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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