so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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