So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
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