My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
