You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Can vaginas get frostbite?
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
