so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Randomize
