I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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