Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
