What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
