she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
