Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
