Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
