Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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