How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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