i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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