Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
