I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
